Okay, so, raise your hand if you’re feeling completely uncertain about the new school year.
Yes?
Thank goodness–I’ve been feeling that, too! With so much up in the air (our district has yet to release any in-person guidelines at all yet), it’s normal to feel anxious about what is to come.
But as the wife of a former-military doctor, I’m no stranger to uncertainty, mama–and I want to help us all start this weird school year off with our best foot forward.
So let’s chat about coping in healthy ways with the crazy that is school in 2020!
Focus on Feeling Good (Not Getting a Lot Done)
If there is one thing I learned last spring, it’s that my usual mom-life schedule doesn’t work well with distance learning.
When the kids were in traditional school, I had a dependable schedule. I knew how to fit work, cleaning, play, and learning into each day, and I was accomplishing a ton.
Then lockdown hit, and my kids needed me to be available in a whole new way–helping them navigate an entirely new way of learning.
Needless to say, my productivity took a major hit.
For a while, everything that wasn’t absolutely necessary took a back seat. I stopped blogging, the dishes piled up in the sink, and I often ended the day frustrated that I hadn’t gotten almost anything done.
But I was doing something! I was helping my kids adjust, learn, and cope! I wasn’t giving myself credit, because the results of that work were invisible.
Don’t do that to yourself, mama.
The best place for our focus to go in these early weeks is on helping everyone (including yourself!) adjust, learn, and cope with whatever this academic year looks like.
Let that work “count” in your heart, too.
Press Pause on Extracurriculars
Starting school usually means getting back into extracurriculars, but it’s important to remember that the more commitments we have, the more outside stress we bring into our homes.
We love having our kids in swimming and music lessons, but (even in a traditional school year) I try to wait a few weeks before I add any like these voluntary extras to our schedule.
Taking some focused time in August to readjust to the rigors of school helps my kids adjust and build a basic school-year routine. From there we can asses what extras they can take on–and what will work for the whole family–without trying to juggle too much at once.
Make Food Easy
Preparing meals takes up a huge slice of the mom-life pie, and even on a good day it can be exhausting.
So unless cooking relaxes you, this is a time to make food SO easy. And then to not beat yourself up about it!
Here are a few ways to simplify mealtimes:
- Pack lunches the night before, even if your kids are distance learning! It will take so much pressure off your busy mornings.
. - Buy some paper plates. I don’t know about you, but when things get crazy at our house, the dishes pile up fast. We keep a stash of paper plates available for those nights when doing the dishes sounds like it might break my spirit for good. ๐
. - Plan super easy dinners for the first week or two–brainless, quick-fix foods that you can throw together without a fuss. Some of our favorite easy meals are:
- Simple sandwiches with raw fruit & veggies,
- Greek yogurt parfaits,
- Quesadillas, and
- “Charcuterie plate” snacky-dinners (just a bunch of yummy fruit, veggies, crackers, and cheeses on a platter together!)
.
- Order out. It’s okay to order a pizza or Door Dash some Panera if you need to.
. - Don’t knock the “cereal dinner.” Mama, when my husband was deployed, my kids at cereal for dinner at least once a week. I wasn’t excited about it, but it got us through some tough evenings.
Bottom line? I would rather my kids have a patient, happy mom and a bowl of cereal than a grumpy, burnt-out one serving a perfect home-cooked meal. It’s okay to know your limits.
Plan a (Regular) Escape Route
When my husband was deployed, I hired a girl from church to come babysit for a few hours once a week–just so I could go do something alone. Many weeks the thought of that time off kept me going!
It’s hard to be in charge 24/7, mama!
And juggling this wacky school year is going to make down-time all the more necessary for your mental health.
Make a plan for your spouse or a family member, babysitter, or fellow mama to take the kids for a few hours once a week.
Use that time to make a Target run, take a nap, call a friend, or do whatever recharges you!
You can’t take care of your people well if you don’t take good care of yourself, too. <3
Give Yourself SO MUCH Grace in the Transition
Mama, starting school this year might be hard, but if I’m honest, starting school is hard on us every year.
The switch to school-year structure after the long, aimless days of summer might be welcome–but it’s also a big challenge.
No matter how much I plan ahead, the process of waking up earlier, setting up new morning routines, and helping my kids adjust to the rigid requirements of the classroom wears me out and throws me off.
But you know what? That’s okay.
You know how toddlers fully melt down when it’s time to leave the park–even if you’re about to go get ice cream or something? That’s because transitions are hard!
If you take nothing else away from this article, I hope you’ll remember this: Give yourself a break.
You’re switching gears, you’re learning something new, and, most importantly, you’re trying to do what’s best for your kids.
Aim for grace over perfection.
xo,
Jamie
