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My Honest Cozy Minimalist Community Review!

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Text reading Should You Join the Cozy Minimalist Community over image of a sofa

Cozy Minimalist Community Review

Let’s get real–while the Cozy Minimalist Community is truly one of my favorite places on the internet, it might not be the right fit for you. I’m here to help you decide!

First, my credentials: I’ve been a member since the community first opened back in 2018, and I’ve learned a TON about creating an intentional, beautiful, personal home. I would say that the Cozy Minimalist principles have changed how I decorate, use, and feel about my home.

I’ve loved learning the skill (and money/frustration-saving power) of decorating in the right order. (Did you know there was a right order?!)

And as someone who has always struggled with keeping a tidy house, I’ve also been so relieved to discover that I can embrace cozy without making my home feel cluttered, and minimal without making my home feel sterile–and that I get to decide what “minimal” means to me!

So, is it going to be a good fit for you?

In the past, I would have said 100% yes, no contest.

But with the recent price change to $18/month (or $150/year), I’ve changed my tune a little.

Want to learn more? Keep reading for my full review & all the details about the Cozy Minimalist Community.

What is the Cozy Minimalist Community?

The Cozy Minimalist Community is a trinity of home design resources that will help you learn to have “more style with less stuff.” It includes

  1. A 5 stage, self-paced home decorating class,
    .
  2. Live weekly videos on a myriad of home-related topics, and
    .
  3. Access to an incredibly positive, supportive community of like-minded cozy minimalists who share inspiration, give feedback, and just generally show up for each other.
Myquillyn Smith giving a live Cozy Mimimalist Community class on a computer

The Cozy Minimalist Classes

The Cozy Minimalist classes will be your starting point–the place where you learn the 5 phases of decorating that our fearless leader, author Myquillyn Smith (a.k.a. “the Nester”), has pinpointed as the path to building a room that feels beautiful, useful, and you.

Myquillyn will walk you through each of the 5 phases:

  • Phase 1: Decide & Create – Learn how to make an inspiration board & plan the purpose of your room before you move a single piece of furniture.
  • Phase 2: Quiet & Arrange – Discover why and how to neutralize your room to create a “blank canvas,” and how to arrange your furniture to become the foundation of your room.
  • Phase 3: The Homey Trinity – Learn how to choose and arrange the “trinity”–rugs, drapes, and lighting–and why you should wait until phase 3 to do it!
  • Phase 4: Walls 3 Ways – Find out how to fill your walls (or when to leave space!) with art and features that feel like you.
  • Phase 5: Accessorize – Learn how to add finishing touches to your room with the pretty little things we all want to buy at Homegoods. ๐Ÿ˜‰

If you’ve ever tried to decorate a room and felt stuck, disappointed, or frustrated by the finished product, the skills you learn in these classes are the foundation you need to find your style and create a room that feels finished.

Live Weekly Classes

In addition to the foundational videos, every Tuesday Myquillyn shows up to give a live class in the Facebook group!

These live “Tuesday Teachings” are all about turning a house into a home. Topics cover everything from shopping second hand, to making a beautiful charcuterie board, to how to style pillows on a sofa!

As Cozy Community members, these live videos have also been a place where we’ve gotten to enjoy “behind the scenes” peeks into things like the process of recording the new class for Myquillyn’s latest book, House Rules.

The topics are new every week, and the way Myquillyn teaches is warm, fun, and inspiring. She really makes you feel like whatever it is you’re hoping to achieve with your home, you can do it!

Cozy Minimalist Facebook Community

The third part of your Cozy Minimalist Community subscription is access to a private Facebook group just for Cozies.

This group are some of the kindest, most supportive people on the internet (and one of the two groups I return to Facebook for!).

Here you can share trouble spots, questions, before and afters, and tiny (or large!) victories, and your new community of like-minded Cozies will show up to troubleshoot, share inspiration, and cheer you on!

Yellow tulips in a vase in a kitchen

Do I Have to Have “Cozy” or “Minimalist” style for the classes to apply to me?

Nope!

The decorating steps and community support will work for almost any style, whether you lean neutral and shabby chic, modern and brightly colored, or anywhere in between.

Who is Myquillyn Smith (“the Nester”?)

Our fearless leader into the land of cozy minimalism is Myquillyn Smith, self-taught interior design expert, author, and all-around lovely, down-to-earth person.

Her inspiring real-life approach to style began on her blog, The Nesting Place, where she shares encouraging, doable ways for real women to create a beautiful home. From there, she got the nickname “the Nester,” and eventually authored four books:

  • The Nesting Place,
  • Cozy Minimalist Home,
  • Welcome Home: A Cozy Minimalist Guide to Decorating and Hosting All Year Round, and
  • House Rules: How to Decorate for Every Home, Style, and Budget

She calls herself our “bossy big sister”–she’s the one who helps us to believe in our own capacity to make a home, and pushes us to actually take the steps to do it!

What is included in the Cozy Minimalist Community?

The Cozy Minimalist Community includes:

  • The “5 Phases of Decorating” Self Study Classes, the foundational home decorating classes that will help you make the right choices in the right order!
  • Weekly LIVE online classes from Cozy Minimalist Home author, Myquillyn Smith (aka “The Nester”), where you’ll have a chance not only to learn from Myq, but also to ask live questions in the comments!
  • A ton of mini-courses, including:
    • The House Hushing Challenge
    • Remember Your Resources, and
    • Know Your Style
  • Access to private Cozy Minimalist Facebook Group filled with other “Cozies” like you and me. Here we share and ask for input on our room progress, encourage each other, answer questions, and share our favorite products and sales. It’s a fun, safe community to grow together!
  • A huge library of past live videos including:
    • Styling bookshelves
    • Shopping secondhand (successfully!)
    • Temporary fixes (how to work with what you have)
    • Outdoor spaces
    • Cozy Kitchens
    • Lamps & Rugs
    • Styling Pillows Beds & Sofas
    • Q&A’s
    • Kids & Decluttering
    • Holiday pep talks,
    • Seasonal decorating,
    • How to Make a Charcuterie board (one of my favs),
    • And LOTS more!
Cozy Minimalist Home book by Myquillyn Smith aka the Nester

Do I need to Read the book “Cozy Minimalist Home” before I join the Community?

Nope–but you might like it!

Myquillyn will teach you the steps found in her book, Cozy Minimalist Home, in the 5 Phases of Decorating classes, so you will get the Cozy Minimalist process without reading the book.

If you want a deeper dive into the process–like how to pick the perfect sofa–or if you want a book to refer back to as you work, you can get it here.

Kitchen sink full of plants

How much does the Cozy Minimalist Community cost?

If you’re just wanting to dip a toe in, you can get it for $18/month, and you can cancel any time.

Or you can choose an annual subscription for $150.

BONUS: If you go with the annual subscription, you’ll save over $60 AND get access to additional mini-courses: “Surface Styling School” and four Seasons & Celebrations masterclasses–one for each of the four seasons!

Will the Nester personally help me design my Room?

No… but a little bit yes?

While Myquillyn won’t be personally coaching you through your room live, there are opportunities to get her feedback on your space!

She makes time to do Q&A videos during some Tuesday Teachings, where you have the opportunity to submit specific questions. (Things like, “What should I do with this massive wall?” or “How can I make my sofa work until I can afford the one I really want?”)

Additionally, in the past she has occasionally offered Mockup Videos for some of her Tuesday Teaching live classes. You can upload photos of your room, share your pain points with it, and Myquillyn will do a mockup of changes you might want to make. She usually makes Photoshop-style tweaks to the photos you’ve sent, adding in curtains or objects to show you how she would approach that spot.

Between live videos, Myquillyn also pops in on the comments of posts in the community sometimes, but the group is large enough that she can’t get to every one.

Happily, your posts there will always be answered by LOTS of your fellow Cozies, many of whom (like me!) have been in the group since it started, and are very familiar with the process.

It’s a lot of fun to pitch in on each other’s rooms, see one another’s progress, and cheer each other on!

Pink and yellow tulips

Will I need to buy all new furniture and things?

No!

Before we buy anything, Myquillyn always encourages us to “shop the house”–meaning look at what you have in other rooms!

She’s also a big proponent of thrift and second-hand shopping (there’s a whole video on that!) and a great coach in making “temporary fixes,” so your house can feel homier even if you can’t change everything you’d like to right away.

Money is tight–should I still give the Cozy Minimalist Community a try?

It depends.

If $18 doesn’t sound like much to you, then absolutely yes–go sign up now! You will find so much value and joy in these resources–which is why I’ve been a member since the day the digital “doors” opened.

But I’ve also been in a place where $20 a month was ALL I had to spend on fun stuff, so if you’re there right now, here’s the advice I would give:

YES, go for it if you’re mentally ready to go all in and really focus on designing a room in your home.

The Nester is the queen of making do with what you have, and she has tons of great ideas about how to stretch your dollar.

One of the archived videos you’ll get access to is about “temporary fixes,” where Myquillyn showed us how to quickly & cheaply update all kinds of things that weren’t in the budget to buy.

That beat up sofa you can’t afford to replace? The ugly backsplash in your kitchen? Those hand-me-down dressers that have seen better days? All covered.

NO, wait a bit if you’re not ready to dive in and make the most of your time in the community. If your brain is scattered across a dozen places, I’d say wait until you are ready to get your dollar’s worth.

The community is a fantastic learning space, but when money is tight you’ll want to make sure you have other resources (like creativity, energy, and mental space) at the ready. Put it in your back pocket and come back to it when you’re ready to go all in.

Sunflowers in a vase on a kitchen counter

Is the CoMi process renter friendly?

Yes, totally.

Myquillyn’s nesting story started in rentals–she even had her rental home featured in two Better Homes and Gardens magazines.

She gets it.

How Do I Know if the Cozy Minimalist Community Will Be a Good Fit?

There are only a couple reasons I can think of that might keep you from loving the Cozy Minimalist Community:

  • You’re not on (or willing to join) Facebook. The heart of the “CoMi” community is in our Facebook group. It’s where all the live Tuesday videos happen, where we share our rooms with each other, and where we all connect.
    .
  • You would rather pay someone to design your room than learn how to design. This community is all about learning to decorate in the right order, and to be brave with your design decisions.
    .
    Because we’re learning, we won’t always get it right–and we may have to repaint or make a return. If you’re looking for a one-and-done decorating experience, you might get frustrated. If you want to grow as a designer and get hands on with your home, come join us!
    .
  • You’re not up for following the steps in order. If there’s one thing I’ve learned from this process, it’s that the order really matters. If you skip around, you’ll end up scratching your head over why your room isn’t working. The order is important! ๐Ÿ™‚
    .
  • You don’t have the mental energy to justify spending $18/month. If the price is making you itchy and you’re not ready to jump in to a design course and start making some changes around your house, you might want to wait until you’re raring to go. (But heads up–the community only opens a handful of times each year, so if you’re ready now, jump on the opportunity!)

If you’re in the CoMi mindset with these four things, I think you’ll really enjoy yourself!

Do You Have Any Cozy Minimalist Before and Afters to Show Me?

I’m so glad you asked! I’m so proud of the transformation in our primary bedroom, and I’d love to share it! (And you can see lots more “before & after” shots from other community members on the Cozy Minimalist page!)

When we moved into our house, we had no idea how we would fill our bedroom! But because of the easy-to-follow steps I learned as a Cozy Minimalist, I was able to pull together a room we truly loved. It was a respite from long days, a great place to hide away, and completely reflected my personal style.

Cozy Minimalist Community before and after photo of master bedroom

So… Should You Join the Cozy Minimalist Community?

If you’re interested in giving it a try, I’d say YES!

I’ve been a member since the day it opened, and even after years of watching Myquillyn’s videos, I still find new inspiration and encouragement every time.

Plus, the support, inspiration, and friendship you’ll feel in the Facebook community is priceless. It’s a truly judgement-free zone, full of women in all stages of life with real-world budgets who really get it. It’s one of my favorite places on the internet.

Because the price is affordable and there’s no commitment, I think it’s an easy step with minimal risk that can result in big payoffs for your home.

So if you’re feeling ready, come join the Cozy Minimalist Community here, and I’ll see you there!

xo,
Jamie

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Simplified Living

Hey, mama. I’m Jamie. I help moms like you learn how to reclaim the light insideโ€“that passion for life that sometimes gets swallowed up in the midst of all that mothering requires of us.ย Let’s work together to find ways to reclaim our true, complete selves in these crazy, exhausting, beautiful years of motherhood. โ™ฅย  ย  ย {Read more…}

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About Jamie

Sometimes when we mother hard, we forget how to be ourselves, too. I'm a mom of four, and while that takes up a lot of my time it's not all I am. I like writing fiction and am learning to watercolor. I love sneaking chocolate in the pantry when my kids aren't looking, and staring up at big white clouds in a blue Texas sky. And I bet you aren't all-mom, either. Let's work together to truly find ourselves in these crazy exhausting beautiful years of motherhood. Read Moreโ€ฆ

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I hated exercise until August of last year.โฃ .โฃ It I hated exercise until August of last year.โฃ
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It always felt kind of like a punishment before, something I had to get through to "earn" calories. Which, you know, made it kind of suck.โฃ
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I tried working out at the gym, doing Jillian Michaels videos alone in my room, and for a while I even paid for a personal trainer.โฃ
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But it all felt REALLY REALLY HARD, because my attitude about exercise was that I needed to exercise to earn worthiness. That my body was not-good-enough as it was.โฃ
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Here's the thing: there is nothing wrong with wanting to be healthier and stronger!โฃ
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But my body couldn't magically, immediately transform into healthier-and-stronger just because I worked out for a few days (or weeks, or months).โฃ
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And I didn't want to wait until my body was x, y, and to declare it worthy. ๐—œ ๐—ฑ๐—ถ๐—ฑ๐—ป'๐˜ ๐˜„๐—ฎ๐—ป๐˜ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—ต๐—ฎ๐˜๐—ฒ ๐—ถ๐˜ ๐—ถ๐—ป๐˜๐—ผ ๐—ฐ๐—ต๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ด๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด.โฃ
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I wanted to live in worthiness ๐˜ธ๐˜ฉ๐˜ช๐˜ญ๐˜ฆ I worked for more health and strength.โฃ
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The big thing that changed for me was just this: I found a workout option that aligned with that. It's called @momma_strong, and it's one of my favorite places on the internet:โฃ
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A new 15 minute HIIT workout every day, lead by the most lovable, strong, down-to-earth mama. A non-Facebook community where you can connect with other mamas and ask any question you want of the MommaStrong Physical Therapist ("Why does my back hurt when I unload dishes?" "Is it normal to pee when I sneeze?" "How to I release this tight muscle?").โฃ
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This is totally unsolicited by them--no sponsoring or anything--and I pay my own money for it every month with JOY. It has made my workout mat my safe place.โฃ
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If you're looking for a way to fit in a workout more often, and a community that will help you feel like your work counts and your body is worthy ๐˜ฏ๐˜ฐ๐˜ธ--I cannot recommend it enough. Hope to see you there. ๐Ÿ˜˜
I honestly still can't believe that this is *my* b I honestly still can't believe that this is *my* before/after! ๐Ÿ˜Š I am so, so proud of this room, and I think it is a huge reason our house sold so quickly (within 2 weeks!) last year.
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I've always loved nesting, but I could never have achieved this room on my own. As @thenester puts it, I was making good decisions--but in the wrong order. Did you even know that was a thing?
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Going through her classes in the Cozy Minimalist Community has taught me all kinds of things, from when to hang my art (not until after the curtains are up! ๐Ÿคฉ) to the impact a rug can make on a room (I never would have put a rug over carpet on my own!).
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And most importantly, it's given me a step-by-step formula to create functional, beautiful rooms that works hard for my family--and the confidence to be a little bolder.
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If you've been dreaming of a home that feels more like ๐˜บ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ, but can't figure out quite how to get there, you couldn't dream up a more affordable, useful, encouraging way to get there than the Cozy Community.
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For just $10 a month (cancelable at any time ๐Ÿ˜Ž) you get weekly live classes from NYT bestselling authoress Myquillyn Smith, where she walks you through exactly how to build a room you love--starting with what you already have. You also get a huge library of past live classes from the past two years of Cozy content, and access to the Facebook community where other "Cozies" share inspiration, answer each other's questions, and generally cheer each other on!
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On the fence? ๐Ÿค” I have a whole review of the course--including why you maybe ๐˜ด๐˜ฉ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ๐˜ญ๐˜ฅ๐˜ฏ'๐˜ต join--linked in my profile ( @brightlightmama ) to help you decide! โค๏ธ๐ŸŒฟ
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#cozyminimalist #comi #mycozyhome #nestingplace #thecozyminimalist #cozyminimalisthome #cozycommunity #howihome
Dear mama, I know you've got a million things you Dear mama, I know you've got a million things you wish you were doing right or better.โฃ
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I know, because I do, too.โฃ
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I wish I was spending daily one-on-one time with each of my four kiddos, reading books to them more regularly, taking more pictures and video. I wish I was a regular library mom, playdate mom, park-going mom. I wish I liked cooking more, that I wrote them monthly notes to read someday when they are older, and that I didn't get headaches from the sheer volume of four happy children making all the joyful (and kind of weird) noises.โฃ
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But when I (all too rarely) pull back and take a look at the ๐—•๐—œ๐—š ๐—ฃ๐—œ๐—–๐—ง๐—จ๐—ฅ๐—˜, I realize: we're doing it, mama.โฃ
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We're raising these babies of ours.โฃ
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We're nudging them toward their paths, encouraging them, loving on them. We're teaching them by our words, and by our imperfect examples how to start over when they mess up. How to be brave. How to say I'm sorry. How to keep showing up, even when it feels hard.โฃ
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Take a look at your big picture today, mama.โฃ
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Look at all you've accomplished, even when you've thought you weren't doing enough. (Even if you, like me, have to fight back that feeling even ๐˜ธ๐˜ฉ๐˜ช๐˜ญ๐˜ฆ you celebrate your wins.)โฃ
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I know you're tired and discouraged, and parenting is maybe the most uncertain, high-stakes thing you've ever done--but you're doing it.โฃ
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Day by day, minute by minute.โฃ
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You're doing so much more than you know. โคโฃ
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โฃ
#honestmotherhood #motherhood #motherhoodrising #uniteinmotherhood #ig_motherhood #dailyparenting #mommylife #workingmom #ohheymama #parenthood #motherhoodunplugged #mothership #momlife #sahm #sahmlife #busymom #parenting #stayathomemom #momsofinstagram #connectingmoms #mummyblogger #motherhoodthroughinstagram #mumblog #humansofjoy #hopewriters #mommylove
You know that friend who always has her own agenda You know that friend who always has her own agenda--and kinda forgets that you have needs to?โฃ
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Tough love time, mama: You might be being ๐˜ต๐˜ฉ๐˜ข๐˜ต kind of friend to your body.โฃ
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How many times have you pushed down what your body needed because you had your own agenda? ๐Ÿ˜ฌโฃ
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Has your body asked for rest, but you've pushed it harder because you're panicked about being able to "do it all." (Psst: Supermoms aren't actually real--I had to hand my kiddo a screen to be able to sit down and type this to you. โค)โฃ
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Has your body said, "I'm hungry," but you've put off eating until later because you're busy, or because an app has told you that your body has had enough calories for today? (Bodies are like wonderful little machines, and they need fuel to keep going!)โฃ
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Has your body asked you for quiet, or movement, or sunshine and fresh air--but you've denied it because it seemed to hard to ask for help, to make the time, to make someone else wait while you took care of yourself?โฃ
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Here's the thing about bodies, mama: They show up for us even when we're being the very worst friends--but we can't expect to somehow love a friend we don't even listen to.โฃ
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I know motherhood is complicated, and sometimes showing up for your body is anything but simple--but you can do it.โฃ
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It doesn't have to be big and showy--no spa days or personal trainers required.โฃ
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Just start by listening and responding:โฃ
Feed it when it is hungry.โฃ
Sit down when it is tired.โฃ
Wear clothes that feel good.โฃ
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Be your body's friend.โฃ
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#bodylove #bodylove4all #bodyconfidence #loveyourbody #momof4 #honormycurves #positivebodyimage #bodyimage #bodyimageresilience #empowerment #empowering #loveyourbody #selfworth #nondiet #selfacceptance #empowerment #bodyacceptance #bodypositivity #bopo #bodyposi #bodydiversity #bodyneutrality #haes #dietculture  #raisingdaughters
I started having panic attacks in the early days o I started having panic attacks in the early days of pandemic lockdown last year, when we couldn't reliably get milk and fresh (or even frozen) produce, we didn't know how the virus spread, and my husband was going into work in the ER during a mask shortage.โฃ
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With the kids cooped up inside for much of the day doing "Zoom school," we soon recognized that we all needed an outlet and instituted a mandatory hour of outside time--for ALL of us--before we started our asynchronous school day.โฃ
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I've always considered myself kind of "indoorsy," but I quickly came to depend on our little suburban slice of nature to soothe my soul, and, as John Burroughs put it, "have my senses put in order."โฃ
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Today your challenge is to do just that. Step outside, even just to stand on the doormat on your porch, or walk down to the mailbox, and take three minutes to ๐—น๐—ฒ๐˜ ๐—ป๐—ฎ๐˜๐˜‚๐—ฟ๐—ฒ ๐˜„๐—ฎ๐˜€๐—ต ๐—ผ๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ๐—ฟ ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ ๐˜€๐—ฒ๐—ป๐˜€๐—ฒ๐˜€.โฃ
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It's easy, in the busyness of adulting, to absorb only what we can ๐˜ด๐˜ฆ๐˜ฆ, so I want you to ๐—ฝ๐—ฎ๐˜† ๐˜€๐—ฝ๐—ฒ๐—ฐ๐—ถ๐—ฎ๐—น ๐—ฎ๐˜๐˜๐—ฒ๐—ป๐˜๐—ถ๐—ผ๐—ป ๐˜๐—ผ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฟ๐—ฒ๐—ฒ ๐—ผ๐—ณ ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ *๐—ผ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ฟ* ๐˜€๐—ฒ๐—ป๐˜€๐—ฒ๐˜€.โฃ
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๐—ช๐—ต๐—ฎ๐˜ ๐—ฑ๐—ผ ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚ ๐—ณ๐—ฒ๐—ฒ๐—น? Warm sun on your hair, a cool breeze on your skin, the weight of a creeping-up summertime humidity or a little chill whispering through the evening air?โฃ
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๐—ช๐—ต๐—ฎ๐˜ ๐—ฑ๐—ผ ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚ ๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ฎ๐—ฟ? Birdsong rippling through the air? The rustle of leaves shivering in the wind, or the buzz of honeybees?โฃ
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๐—ช๐—ต๐—ฎ๐˜ ๐—ฑ๐—ผ ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚ ๐˜€๐—บ๐—ฒ๐—น๐—น? The floral scent of jasmine, the sharpness of fresh-mown grass, the damp earthy fragrance of soil after rain?โฃ
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Let nature put your senses in order today and ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ๐—ฐ๐—ผ๐—ป๐—ป๐—ฒ๐—ฐ๐˜ ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚ ๐˜„๐—ถ๐˜๐—ต ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐—บ๐—ฎ๐—ป๐˜† ๐˜๐—ต๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด๐˜€ ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ ๐—ฏ๐—ผ๐—ฑ๐˜† ๐—ฐ๐—ฎ๐—ป ๐—ฝ๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐—ฐ๐—ฒ๐—ถ๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ when you give it a little space.โฃ
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#optoutside #essentialism #slowmotherhood #simplicity #simplifiedliving #motherhoodsimplified #bodyneutrality #motherhoodunplugged #bodyconfidence #loveyourbody #mentalhealth
Toddlers set a beautifully simple example of the b Toddlers set a beautifully simple example of the body connection we all long for.
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They're fully devoted to ๐—ฏ๐—ผ๐—ฑ๐˜† ๐—ฐ๐˜‚๐—ฟ๐—ถ๐—ผ๐˜€๐—ถ๐˜๐˜† ๐—ผ๐—ป ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ถ๐—ฟ ๐—ผ๐˜„๐—ป ๐˜๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐—บ๐˜€:
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Will my body fit into this cupboard? This basket? This Tupperware?
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What does it feel like to squeeze a whole banana into mush?
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Do I like the taste of Play-doh, Old Spice deodorant, or wood chips from the playground? (Why is the answer to these "Yes!" though, toddlers?)
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Toddlers are ๐˜„๐—ถ๐—น๐—ฑ๐—น๐˜† ๐—ฐ๐˜‚๐—ฟ๐—ถ๐—ผ๐˜‚๐˜€, and they use their bodies to explore their environment with an enthusiasm that leaves most toddler-mamas exhausted. ๐Ÿ˜œ 
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๐—ช๐—ฒ ๐—บ๐—ฎ๐—บ๐—ฎ๐˜€ ๐—ป๐—ฒ๐—ฒ๐—ฑ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ๐—ฐ๐—น๐—ฎ๐—ถ๐—บ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฎ๐˜ ๐—ฐ๐˜‚๐—ฟ๐—ถ๐—ผ๐˜€๐—ถ๐˜๐˜† ๐—ถ๐—ป ๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ๐˜€๐—ฒ๐—น๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ๐˜€.
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Toddler curiosity never comes perfectly packaged:
They're furious that they can't fit their lower body into a Tupperware! They're constantly covered in mud, Crayola markers, or applesauce. And while they will happily devour half a stick of deodorant if left unsupervised while you pee for ONE MINUTE, they ๐˜ธ๐˜ช๐˜ญ๐˜ญ scream if you try to feed them a delicious slice of watermelon or a quesadilla served on the wrong color plate.
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We don't have to be perfect in our curiosity either!
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I am consistently fussy when I try to do an exercise that my body is new at (I'm looking at you, diamond pushups, you big jerks), embarrassed when I fumble the keys during piano lessons, and frustrated at how slowly my hands are learning to draw a reasonably good portrait.
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That's okay! Curiosity can be messy. Messy is allowed.
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๐—ง๐—ผ๐—ฑ๐—ฎ๐˜† ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ ๐—ฐ๐—ต๐—ฎ๐—น๐—น๐—ฒ๐—ป๐—ด๐—ฒ ๐—ถ๐˜€ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—ฏ๐—ฒ ๐˜๐—ผ๐—ฑ๐—ฑ๐—น๐—ฒ๐—ฟ-๐—น๐—ฒ๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ๐—น ๐—ฐ๐˜‚๐—ฟ๐—ถ๐—ผ๐˜‚๐˜€, and use your body to explore your world more deeply.
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What does the tall grass in your backyard feel like? Do you still dislike blueberries? Can you do a pushup? (If you can't, do you want to learn?)
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Feel the feelings that come with these things, but don't beat yourself up. Just be curious. Wonder. Try. Log that information, and be curious about more things.
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Want a little accountability? Come back here and share your in the comments what you got curious about today!
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#bodylove4all #bodyconfidence #loveyourbody #positivebodyimage #bodyimage #loveyourbody
When you were a little kid, your primary goal was When you were a little kid, your primary goal was to ๐—ฃ๐—Ÿ๐—”๐—ฌ ๐—”๐—ฆ ๐— ๐—จ๐—–๐—› ๐—”๐—ฆ ๐—ฃ๐—ข๐—ฆ๐—ฆ๐—œ๐—•๐—Ÿ๐—˜. You were 100% sure that this was the purpose of your body.
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Not chores, not school, not eating a balanced meal with all the food groups accounted for. Nope. Those were uses of your body (usually spoon-fed to you by grown ups). But to you the purpose of your body was PLAY!
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What do you think is the purpose of your body now?
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To clean up the kitchen again, and go get more groceries? To keep your toddler and/or dog out of the trashcan? To remember everybody's dental appointments and birthdays and shoe sizes?
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These are all noble purposes--but they're not necessarily joyful.
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They might make you feel ๐˜จ๐˜ณ๐˜ข๐˜ต๐˜ฆ๐˜ง๐˜ถ๐˜ญ for your body in that adulty I-should-feel-grateful way, but they probably don't help you enjoy and connect with your body.
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Play, though? Play is joyful!
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Play lets us appreciate and enjoy living in our bodies.
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๐—ช๐—ต๐—ฎ๐˜ ๐—ฑ๐—ผ๐—ฒ๐˜€ ๐—ฝ๐—น๐—ฎ๐˜† ๐—ณ๐—ฒ๐—ฒ๐—น ๐—น๐—ถ๐—ธ๐—ฒ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚?
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Not the obligatory play-pretend-with-the-kids, but ๐˜บ๐˜ฐ๐˜ถ๐˜ณ kind of play.
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Look for play you can do ๐˜ธ๐˜ฉ๐˜ช๐˜ญ๐˜ฆ you do your adulty stuff, like dancing like a weirdo with some Meghan Trainor in your headphones while you clean the kitchen.
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Look for play you can do JUST FOR THE SAKE OF PLAY--like taking time to draw or cook something just because it sounds fun.
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Look for ways you can use play to connect, like making silly faces at your kid across the dinner table, or saying "Yes" to a tickle fight.
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More fun = more connection with your body, so ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ ๐—ฐ๐—ต๐—ฎ๐—น๐—น๐—ฒ๐—ป๐—ด๐—ฒ ๐˜๐—ผ๐—ฑ๐—ฎ๐˜† ๐—ถ๐˜€ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—ณ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ฑ ๐—ฎ ๐˜„๐—ฎ๐˜† ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—ฃ๐—Ÿ๐—”๐—ฌ!
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#joyspotting #bodylove #bodylove4all #bodyconfidence #loveyourbody #momof4 #honormycurves #positivebodyimage #bodyimage #bodyimageresilience #empowerment #empowering #loveyourbody #selfworth #nondiet #selfacceptance #empowerment #bodyacceptance #bodypositivity #bopo #bodyposi #bodydiversity #bodyneutrality #haes #dietculture #iweigh #raisingdaughters
Do you ever feel totally angry at or disconnected Do you ever feel totally angry at or disconnected from your body? Like, who even ๐˜ช๐˜ด my body anymore?โฃ
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As women, our relationships with our bodies get incredibly complicated even early on in our lives--and especially when ๐˜„๐—ฒ ๐—ณ๐—ฒ๐—ฒ๐—น ๐—น๐—ถ๐—ธ๐—ฒ ๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ ๐—ฏ๐—ผ๐—ฑ๐—ถ๐—ฒ๐˜€ ๐—ต๐—ฎ๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ ๐—น๐—ฒ๐˜ ๐˜‚๐˜€ ๐—ฑ๐—ผ๐˜„๐—ป.โฃ
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Your might feel angry at and betrayed by your body--maybe you have for years:โฃ
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Because you bled through your clothes when you were a tween, or didn't get your period until so late in life that it was scary, or never got one at all.โฃ
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Because your breasts grew too early or too late, too big or too small.โฃ
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Because your body didn't match the shapes you idealized, or the strength you hoped you'd have.โฃ
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Because you couldn't exercise without using an inhaler.โฃ
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Because it carries painful and challenging chronic illness, or needs antidepressants to function better.โฃ
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Because it looks so different than people always notice it and talk about it--even tease you about it or turn away from you over it.โฃ
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Because it couldn't get pregnant, or couldn't carry your baby full term.โฃ
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Because it couldn't produce enough milk to nurse, or because nursing was so painful or difficult that it became impossible.โฃ
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Because it didn't "bounce back" after you gave birth, won't get smaller when you want it to, has aches and pains that seem to come from nowhere, doesn't fit into your pre-pregnancy jeans, insists on wearing clothes with a bigger number on the tag.โฃ
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So many reasons.โฃ
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Last week I confessed that this year I've felt deeply sad about how my body looks. And as I shared about ๐˜ฎ๐˜บ feelings about my body I realized, all of a sudden, that ๐—œ'๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ ๐—ฏ๐—ฒ๐—ฒ๐—ป ๐—ด๐—ฟ๐—ถ๐—ฒ๐˜ƒ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐—ฏ๐—ผ๐—ฑ๐˜† ๐—œ ๐˜๐—ต๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ด๐—ต๐˜ ๐—œ'๐—ฑ ๐—ต๐—ฎ๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ ๐˜ง๐˜ฐ๐˜ณ ๐˜บ๐˜ฆ๐˜ข๐˜ณ๐˜ด.โฃ
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This week we're going to look at gently reconnecting with our bodies. Dipping a toe in the water of re-trusting. Putting into practice our mantra that ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐—ฝ๐˜‚๐—ฟ๐—ฝ๐—ผ๐˜€๐—ฒ ๐—ผ๐—ณ ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ ๐—ฏ๐—ผ๐—ฑ๐˜† ๐—ถ๐˜€ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—ฐ๐—ผ๐—ป๐—ป๐—ฒ๐—ฐ๐˜ ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚ ๐˜„๐—ถ๐˜๐—ต ๐˜๐—ต๐—ฒ ๐˜„๐—ผ๐—ฟ๐—น๐—ฑ.โฃ
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๐—ฌ๐—ผ๐˜‚ ๐—ฑ๐—ฒ๐˜€๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—ณ๐—ฒ๐—ฒ๐—น ๐—ด๐—ผ๐—ผ๐—ฑ ๐—ถ๐—ป ๐˜†๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ ๐—ฏ๐—ผ๐—ฑ๐˜†.โฃ
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[Photo of me riding my broom "horse" in my shiny robe, circa 1989 ๐Ÿ˜˜]
What if you didn't have to earn love by looking be What if you didn't have to earn love by looking better? What if you already are loved as you are--how would that change how you feel in and about your body?โฃ
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Could you start living and working from a place of encouragement instead of desperation?โฃ
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Could you stop trying to earn your worthiness by changing you body--and just look after it instead?โฃ
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This concept from @lysaterkeurst 's book profoundly changed me: "Live from the abundant place that you are loved, and you wont find yourself begging others for scraps of love."โฃ
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Until we choose to allow ourselves to receive and accept love ๐™–๐™จ ๐™ฌ๐™š ๐™–๐™ง๐™š ๐™ฃ๐™ค๐™ฌ, we will continuously, frantically scramble toward an imaginary pinnacle of self that is "worthy."โฃ
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No need to scramble, sweet mama: you are already worthy of love.โฃ
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Your challenge now is to bravely open your heart up, and let it in.
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